Friday, 19 December 2008

Next Time, It'll Just Be "AARGH"!

Product: Peperami
Slogan: "Peperami: It's a Bit of an Animal"
Suggested Alternative: "Eat First. Read Ingredients List Later."

Kudos for the ingenious portmanteau of "pepperoni" and "salami" in the name of this product. The slogan itself is more unfortunate than bad. It may be a bit of an animal, but which bit? Frankly, this is one of those snacks you can only really enjoy if you can take your mind off the fact that it's probably made of the 'bits of animals' that were left over after making everything else. I can't help but love the damned things though...

Product : Vauxhall Corsa
Slogan : "C'MON!"
Suggested Alternative : "Why not buy a Vauxhall Corsa? They're Really Quite Good."

Plucked from one of my most hated adverts in recent years, this slogan barely qualifies as a word, let alone a sentence. It's probably the most ambiguous and pointless slogan I have ever heard. It doesn't refer to the quality of the product. It doesn't refer to the product at all. It doesn't even sound particularly positive, especially when screamed by a deformed soft toy with a hideously distorted voice. Even the chants invented by football supporters are better than this. At least they have the sense to append "you blues!" to the phrase. (The only two football teams in the world are still 'The Reds' and 'The Blues', right?)

And come where, precisely?

4 comments:

  1. No there is another one; "C'mon you pink tye-died ones!"

    I do like the knitted things in those adverts though.

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  2. Really? I think they're extremely ugly.

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  3. They're weird looking, but I like that you can buy actual knitted toys of them. It seemed like good merchandising. It doesn't have to be anything to do with the car because car advertising has a long history of being irrelavent.

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  4. Differently Sane5 January 2009 at 14:44

    Rome had the Blues and Greens chariot racing teams, and so did Byzantium. Nothing changes. Although the racing teams gained political affiliations and status in Constantinople.

    Can't imagine football supporters staging a coup and deposing the Roman Emperor. Actually, I can... So glad we don't live in the Roman Empire now.

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